answered questions...

It has been interesting - watching people's reaction when they hear we are adopting. I may have pictures up here soon, so you can relate to my family when I blog about them, but for now, you can just imagine :-)

We have 5 natural children. Christian (18), Gabe (nearly 17), Luke (15), Victoria (13), and Emmanuelle (9). Most of our friends have been very excited for us, I think this is largely due to the fact that we have taught a number of parenting classes at our church, and those close to us know that we are managing to raise fairly responsible and respectable young adults. (Actually, they are amazing, fabulous, kids with phenomenal reputations, but I don't want to sound too proud!) there are others, though, who look at us a little cross-eyed...so, I hope to help readers understand what people are THINKING, adding MORE kids to their home!

Q: Why do you want more kids?
A: Because we ADORE the ones we've got, who wouldn't want more of an awesome, amazing thing?

Q: how will you afford another person, when you have often struggled financially?
A: honestly, we never afforded any of them. God provides what all of them need, all the time. yes, we work to bring in money, and a slow economy hit us very hard in the field of fancy carpentry work, but God has always been faithful. there is no logic when you are being obedient, and we clearly feel like this particular baby is something God is handing in our direction, asking "are you willing?" If we relied on our own strength to make this "work" - none of it ever would. I would be a nervous wreck, my husband would be in an institution somewhere, and our family would have no testimony. What would be the point of life then? "What has God done for you?": "Oh, not much, I pretty much do it all myself". wooHOO? That will not likely draw people to a loving, caring, miraculous Savior!

Q: do you REALIZE the gap(!) there will be between your kids now and the new baby?
A: YES! It freaks me out, bc I don't want to raise a little piece of royalty, which is almost inevitable when 7 other people think you are so "CUTE"! So, God & I are discussing that one now - and He knows my heart. Yes, I'd like to add another, and all of these questions & answers will apply then, too!

Q: Won't the act of adding a newborn to the lives of your teenagers be very difficult?
A: Probably, BUT - who wouldn't want to marry a sweet young man that is comfortable around babies, and knows they really aren't so scary? When Ben and I were married, and had baby #1 eleven months after our wedding day, they cradled an adorable little blonde boy wrapped in a blanket like a hot dog, and said "Here, Daddy". His eyes grew wide and he was SCARED.TO.DEATH. it only took seconds for him to be in love, but the fear remained for YEARS! Babies were foreign to him, and it breaks my heart still. School make sure we learn all about the Gettysburg address and how to add fractions, but to be comfortable around spit-up, poopy diapers, or a crying wife & baby? well, you're on your own there. I don't want that for my sons. NO, I can't keep adding babies forever to remedy that problem, BUT, before long, there will be grandchildren, which means nieces & nephews, and those little aunts/uncles will get their baby exposure then.

Q; Are you really "ready" for all the trouble a baby brings? (it will be 10 years when Bibi arrives.) Sleepless nights, stinky diapers, crying, baby paraphernalia *everywhere*...
A: YES!! All of that discomfort and inconvenience is totally worth it to pour into the life of someone so precious, and raise them to serve & honor God.

Q: what will y ou name the baby?
A: I prefer Axel for a boy, and, I think, Scarlett for a girl. Axel, a Danish name, is in Ben's family tree, and means "Father of peace", If there was ever a time we needed peace brought into our home, it will be with this new addition! Scarlett, of course, means red - but it has deeper significance to me. When Emmanuelle was born a 27-week preemie, there was a tremendous amount of fear surrounding the whole event, which caused us to decide on a sterilization procedure. I knew in my heart it was not the right thing to do, but fear superseded hearing from God that day, and the permanent damage was done. I'm not saying this is the case for everyone, but I knew it was for us, and my husband agrees. I always felt God was saying "you aren't done yet", so I've waited. Back to the name - Scarlett, and its meaning, "red" - everything in the Bible regarding covenants has to do with blood, and the color red, and more specifically, the story regarding the overtaking of Jericho and the scarlet thread that signified that family that would receive (Godly) protection. because of that promise I felt God made to use, that there would me be more children in the future, this precious baby seems to signify that, I and I want to honor God by making a statement about what He has done. Our other name considerations? Magnus for a boy, and Mercedes or Dahlia for a girl.

Q: So, WHY another baby?
A: Because, in the words of a dear, adoptive mother friend of mine, "Your kids are the only thing you take to heaven with you."

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and have a lovely day!

More details, and a baby-sized title.

The babe has been officially dubbed "Bibi" - it is Swedish for "alive" - which we would very much like it to be!

The Momma seems very happy with her decision, I spoke with the Grandmom & Granddad today, and they too are peaceful about the whole arrangement. I think adopting is more difficult than a physical pregnancy, and I have a newfound respect for women who go through this process. it is a HUGE waiting game, filled with uncertainties that extend beyond "will the baby have my eyes or his?", or, "will this angel be born a little hyperactive, or very, very quiet?". No, this is much different . It is "will I be there to witness the birth, will I be heartbroken if I miss it?", "will the momma cry at the sight of me, and the pain I am representing in her life?",  "will the journey of explaining how you came to join our family be a trying, emotional one filled with resentment, or gratitude?"

Lord, help me please, to love this little one just like I have loved our other children. Please have little Bibi know that they are such a treasure, and that a tremendous amount of thought and respect was poured into creating a life where Bibi is encouraged to be who God wants him/her to be, while heart and mind are shaped with tenderness. Thank you for the gift you've created, please give me the strength to do a very, very good job. Amen.

AND, the journey begins...

SO.....as of this week, we have agreed to adopt a precious baby from louisiana! we had not been actively pursuing adoption, but it was on our hearts to do if God ever provided a clear path for it. I just am not sure my faith was ever big enough to request of God that He provide the thousands of dollars an agency requires to finalize expanding a family. however - I DID have faith that God could to something creative, which he did. a college student whose family we know fairly well fell pregnant. In addition to wanting her precious child to grow up in a home with 2 parents and lots of loving siblings, she is not wanting to give up her college scholarship or her dreams of doing something great in the world, so she has given us the honor of becoming adoptive parents!

We've had nearly 10 years since the 27-week birth of Emmanuelle and a subsequent tubal ligation, waiting for it to FAIL. (I know - helLO? looong story.) The new babe is due 2 days before Emme turns 10. I've heard countless times that a 10 year window is pretty typical for a tubal to fail, so in my mind, I always guessed we'd add a child in about 10 years. I just didn't know it would happen *this* way!

I canNOT describe how absolutely amazed, humbled, grateful, and blessed I feel to be a part of this whole process! we do not yet know the gender of the babe, but i will be keeping everyone posted, and this blog will once again become an active one, bc I have something to talk about! love you all!